Ahhhh.
Ladies and GENTLEMEN. Today is a day.
Today is not just any day but today is my ~birthday~ or as I would like to consider it: my own personal New Year’s Day. Despite being a Leo, I actually despise my birthday- this year, I am elated. Today marks day 1 of a new year, a new age, and putting all the fuckery that 23 threw my way behind me.
23 was by far one of the hardest years of my life.
23 was the epitome of rock bottom’s basement and I am so proud of myself to say that 365 days later I am a completely different person because of it. Today is a day of freedom, a day of new beginnings, and a day that I get to celebrate the truth that lays behind the saying “the only way out of hell is through it” and baby did we EVER crawl through hell to get here…
I guess what I’m trying to say is, that when you feel like there is no way up; when you feel like life keeps literally body slamming you to a numbness you can’t even describe anymore, and when you feel like you’ve hit a point where you’re questioning your worth, you have to realize that every little piece, every little downfall, failure, and lesson you learn makes you into a stronger person eventually.
When you’re 20, you’re useless, and too immature for the title of “being in your twenties”; you’re using a fake ID at your college’s hole in the wall bar and still making out with Brad from Sigma Apple Pie in the back of Ubers. At 21 you’re ordering cranberry vodkas at the club because you don’t know any better and naive to the fact that college is coming to an end soon. 22 you’re transitioning out of the $2 doubles of your college town and into the $8 singles of the real world, and 23 you’re making every mistake you promised yourself you wouldn’t make when you were 19.
So now we’re 24.
Too young to act responsible, but at the same time, too responsible to act too young. So, for sake of the best of both worlds, here are 24 things I’ve learned at 24. Maybe you’ll resonate with something- maybe you won’t- who knows.
But I really hope you will.
- Birthdays are less about “presents” and more about “presence”. I have people in my life who would go to war for me at the drop of a hat and that is worth more than pretty much anything someone could buy me in this lifetime.
- Life doesn’t stop being fun after you graduate as long as you let it. – Promise.
- Take a job because you’ll love it- not because you’ll make more money- you’ll end up hating it and quitting anyways.
- Not everyone in your life is here to stay- some people are just around long enough to teach us an important lesson and leave, and that’s okay.
- Say yes, a lot. If it works out- that’s great; if it doesn’t- it’s a great story to tell.
- You will realize who your superficial friendships were when you leave your college town. The people who really love you will always stick around.
- Always have the feeling that you’re going to figure it out and you will always find a solution somehow.
- Don’t expect a relationship, a job, a purchase, or a person to fix your unhappiness. The only way to find your happiness is to find it internally. If you don’t, you’ll just be chasing things and people who don’t matter your entire life.
- Don’t look for goals or achievements to check off a list someone else told you to make. If you don’t want to do something- don’t; and vice versa. The deadlines for our life in college and out of college are unfair and unrealistic for the most part.
- Don’t date a frat boy, they will never grow up lol.
- Feeling good is more important than looking good and being healthy doesn’t mean being skinny. Stop starving yourself and ruining your metabolism, trust me lol. Also, find a way to be active that you genuinely enjoy. Your sanity will thank you; so, will your body.
- When a guy you’re seeing does something shitty to you and another girl is involved, realize that they’re both pieces of shit- not just the girl. Infidelity is a two-way street sister! Also, once a cheater, always a cheater.
- Your love life will change during your 20’s a lot- your true friends will not.
- As we get older, so do our parents and grandparents regardless if we want to acknowledge it or not. Take time for your family no matter what, they will be there when no one else is.
- If you don’t go after what you want in your life, no one is going to be as upset as you are if you don’t get it.
- Get comfortable with being uncomfortable, or you will never grow.
- Realize that you can appreciate the beauty of others without questioning your own, and realize that celebrating someone else’s successes won’t ever downplay or negatively affect yours.
- If you wait until you’re ready to do something, you will be waiting your whole life. Do it when you want it, not when you think you have the time/money/strength/etc. to do so.
- Greek life doesn’t matter when you’re out of college, and it’s kind of overrated while you’re in college anyway- don’t get lost in the drama and don’t be a mean girl. People will always remember how you made them feel.
- Be nice to everyone, being mean is super tacky and you also never know who your future co-workers/supervisors will be.
- You don’t have to wait until the weekend to make plans. M-Th can be just as enjoyable if you let it.
- If you stand for everything you stand for nothing. Be a passionate person, but don’t have 435 “niches’”. Life doesn’t work like that.
- Show up every day in life. Imagine the woman you want to be and show up as her every day. When you become her, raise the bar higher and level up.
- Time truly does heal everything. One day you’ll wake up, and you’re just not as upset anymore. It’s then where you realize that you have all the power in the world to create a life you love and more importantly, a life you deserve.
Cheers to 24 insane years around the sun. God bless the people who have gotten me this far, you know who you are ;).
Until next week.
xoxo,
Carlie Bradshaw
Sex & The Suburbs 